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4 Choices


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#21 Saldor010

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 01:40 PM

A: Put coin from your pocket in the tin, then shake it and say "Spare change" humorously

Since you know you can't escape very well, because you're fat and all, you decided to humor the Cave Men. Sadly, you forgot that Cave Men had no sense of humor. You get beaten over the head with a club, but luckily, you don't pass out this time.

A: Try to escape anyways. (Waddle waddle waddle)
B: Ask for forgiveness.
C: Call your fairy godmother.
D: Use the force, Luke.. Use the force..

#22 LDDestroier

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 05:37 PM

B: Ask for forgiveness.

You tell them that you're sorry for your ill-fated joke, but cavemen don't speak English, dummy. All the words they know are Ugh, Urr, and Ooo. You now feel stupid because you should've known that after watching 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy'. Maybe you asked because of the blunt trauma. That would explain why you feel woozy, almost drunk.

They finally take you to the caveman cult leader. He starts yelling out random grunts for about four minutes. After that, they take you to a cave (fitting for a caveman, isn't it?) and lock you up in a stone solid-wall cell that also contains a sleeping cougar. It looks slightly weakened and very tired, probably from eating food prepared by a caveman. Out of fear from terrible meals, you:

A: Stomp on the cougar and eat it raw.
B: Prod the cougar with your finger.
C: Cry and poop yourself.
D: Bang on the door and shout.

#23 Saldor010

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 06:06 PM

B: Prod the cougar with your finger.

It turns out, the cougar was a shapeshifter, that arrived here from a future time via the rip you caused earlier. She's very weak and tired, but she believes that if you can help her, she might be able to get bust you and herself out of the cavemen's clutches.

A: "What do I need to do?"
B: "Pfft, I'm just going to eat you."
C: "I'll help you, but only if you change into something awesome, like a dinosaur."
D: Say nothing, but just stand there awkwardly.

#24 LDDestroier

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 06:36 PM

A: "What do I need to do?"

You ask the shapeshifter what to do, and she tells you to break down the door.
The door. The door made of wood and tall grass. Made by a caveman.

You easily tear it apart with your hands, and now you are in a hallway. There appears to be quite a bit of noise from the 2nd door, so you can safely assume that is where you came from. However, you can ALSO assume that there are lots of cavemen that can and will beat you to pulp if they see you out of the cage. You and the shapeshifter decide to quickly:

A: Sneak to the first door, which no one is in.
B: Run to the 4th door, where either a quiet caveman or a loud animal is in.
C: Sprint across the 2nd room, where all the cavemen are worshiping the sun.
D: Think for twenty more seconds.

#25 UMayBleed

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 06:51 PM

A: Sneak to the first door.

You and the shapeshifter then move to the first door silently, hoping not to make any noise. The shapeshifter turns into a key that fits that door, you pick him up, and open the first door. Once you open the door, the shapeshifter then turns back into a human, and points over to the deck. The 1st door was still open.

A. Grab a potato from the kitchen and make tons of noise throwing it onto a car with an alarm
B. hide in the closet
C. close the door behind you, but causes noise which attracts the cavemen.
D. Use the shapeshifter as a ladder to climb down.

#26 KingofGamesYami

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 06:58 PM

A. Grab a potato from the kitchen and make tons of noise throwing it onto a car with an alarm

The alarm fails to go off, but the caveman spots the movement!

A. Use the shapeshifter as a sword and attack the caveman
B. Run away as fast as you can
C. Stand frozen in terror as the caveman bashes in your skull
D. Use the shapeshifter as a club and bash at the car, attempting to set off the alarm

#27 LDDestroier

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 07:25 PM

B: Run away as fast as you can

Cheese it!

You find an exit to the place and run through it. As you sprint, there is a crowd of cavemen screaming and wildly swinging their clubs randomly. They don't appear to be focusing at all on you. As you look up, there appears to be a giant black tear in the sky that is sucking up whatever comes close. You look deeper in it, and you see your living room, along with a ton of dirt, rocks, and a few clubs. You determine that it is the same hole that you came from, or at least, a hole that leads to your house, which is all you need to know. If you go right below it, then you'll get sucked up.

A: Get sucked back up into the future, along with the shapeshifter.
B: Run with all the cavemen.
C: Wet yourself with anticipation.
D: Throw a rock into the rip in space and time.

#28 Saldor010

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 08:58 PM

A: Get sucked back up into the future, along with the shapeshifter.

Sadly, you and the shapeshifter went too far in the rip, and landed in the year 2907 AD.

You and the shapeshifter look around at the barren wasteland. It appears to be night time, but the land is still lit up. You look into the distance, and you see a fiery mushroom cloud. This must be a post apocalyptic world. You start feeling a very strong wind coming from the mushroom cloud. Then, you see the mile long high cloud of debris, racing towards you and the shapeshifter.

A: Pull the shapeshifter and yourself back through the rip in time.
B: Stand still and see what happens.
C: Duck and cover.
D: Wake up from the very odd dream.

#29 LDDestroier

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 10:40 PM

A: Pull the shapeshifter and yourself back through the rip in time.

You decide to quickly get out of the area, thus saving yourself from turning into poorly prepared McRibs.
Again, you go a bit too far, and you end up in early May of 1992. You crawl out of a dumpster that you fell into, and look around. It appears to be morning; about around 9 o'clock. By now your mind has been really jostled, what with the time machine, caveman army, and rips in the sky. You ask someone about what's going on.

After that man promptly gives you the finger, you go walk around town, looking at everything. You see an ad for Wolfenstein 3D, and it looks pretty new, so you can assume it's about 1990.

You have your Ubuntu Edge phone that you got off of indiegogo before they stopped funding it. It has 98% charge. It also has a bunch of games on it.

A: Go to a hackerspace and brag about your smartphone (1990's, man.)
B: Go back into the space rip (that I guess only you can see)
C: Remove pants and take a dump directly on the road
D: Go get a donut from the nearest Quik-E-Mart.

#30 Saldor010

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 01:51 AM

D: Go get a donut from the nearest Quik-E-Mart.

You walk into the Quik-E-Mart, grab a donut from the shelf (Mm, still warm :D ), and walk over to the cashier. It appears, the cashier is a Samurai from middle ages Japan. Man, that rip in space and time screwed EVERYTHING up! You think to yourself as you pay for your donut. The shapeshifter walks into the Quik-E-Mart behind you.

A: Ask the Shapeshifter what she thinks you guys should do next.
B: Eat the donut.
C: Eat the donut AND ask the Shapeshifter what she thinks you guys should do next.
D: Go use the bathroom.

#31 KingofGamesYami

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 03:36 AM

B: Eat the donut

The donut turns out to be poisoned. After rushing to the emergency room, it is identified as a rare poison with a rare antidote only found in Japan.

A: Fly to Japan to get the antidote
B: Order the antidote through the mail service
C: Try to enjoy the few days you have left
D: Attempt to go to the future, where the antidote is readily available

#32 LDDestroier

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 11:58 AM

A: Fly to Japan to get the antidote.

You fly to Japan so you can find the antidote. That, and it's easy to make up things that would happen in Japan, 1992.
By the time you got to Japan, you think to yourself, why would a poison take a few days to work? You don't feel well, but seriously, just use cyanide if you want someone dead.

You arrive at Japan Airlines. You walk out the exit, and you see a huge Super Mario World ad across a building, some suggestive octopus anime, cars everywhere, and a few good looking fish restaurants.

A: Go into a sushi restaurant.
B: Go mug someone off the street.
C: Wet yourself again.
D: Go get a Super Nintendo.

#33 Saldor010

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 02:26 PM

A: Go into a sushi restaurant.

You go into one of the many Sushi Restaurants on the main road. You were going to eat something, but you forgot that you were allergic to fish. It was then that you noticed, the chef of the Sushi Restaurant was a hippie from 1960's America. Instead of making sushi, he was burning it, and protesting against eating the "creatures of the sea".

A: Walk back onto the street and meet up with the shapeshifter.
B: Run to the local hospital to see if they have the antidote.
C: Go see an old guru by a pond and see if he'll teach you Karate.
D: Try to salvage a piece of sushi and eat it anyways.

Edited by Jiloacom, 23 October 2014 - 02:26 PM.


#34 LDDestroier

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 09:58 PM

C: Go see an old guru by a pond and see if he'll teach you Karate.

The old guru insults you for assuming that he knows karate. He tells you that karate is more American than Japanese nowadays, and starts murmuring to himself.
You feel a bit better; the poison must've been something like poison ivy oil or something.
You and the shapeshifter decide (well you decided anyway) to jump back to the sky tear, only to fly back into the distant future, where Mom's Friendly Robot Company rules home appliances, robots exist and binge drink to survive, everyone is an inconsiderate idiot who has terrible fashion taste, and people get around in giant city-mounted pneumatic tubes.

A: Jump into a tube.
B: Ask for directions.
C: Go get a job.
D: Find a medicine vending machine.

#35 Saldor010

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Posted 23 October 2014 - 10:04 PM

C: Go get a job.

Sadly, only Planet Express has a job open, and it's for a delivery boy position. You would have to work with a purple haired cyclops, and a robot. You promptly declined the job.

A: Find a medicine vending machine.
B: Jump through the rip in space and time.
C: Explore New-New York.
D: Wake up from this very weird dream.

#36 LDDestroier

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Posted 29 October 2014 - 12:30 PM

C: Explore New New York.

You go around this giant future city, scanning for anything interesting. You notice the cars are floating, the city hall is labeled Citihall, and no one has any taste when it comes to clothes.

A: Mug someone.
B: Exclaim 'Bender is great'.
C: Quote Star Trek to a nerd.
D: Look straight down.

#37 Saldor010

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Posted 29 October 2014 - 01:34 PM

C: Quote Star Trek to a nerd.

The police quickly come by and arrest you, because Star Trek was outlawed for reasons we won't go into right now.

You and the shapeshifter are sitting in the cell.

A: Try to bust out.
B: Exclaim "Bender is great".
C: Sit in the cell.
D: Ask the shapeshifter to shapeshift into a robot.

#38 LDDestroier

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Posted 11 November 2014 - 11:32 PM

A: Try to bust out.

You can't bust out, man. Those doors are made of TITANIUM ALLOY. You try anyway and whack the door. They yell at you to shut it, and you feel sad.

A: Commit suicide.
B: Commit suicide.
C: Commit suicide.
D: Poo in the food slot.

#39 Saldor010

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Posted 12 November 2014 - 03:07 AM

B: Commit suicide.

Silly rabbit, you can't end the story yet! Instead, you just brutally maim yourself in a suicide attempt.
The guards decide that you're a menace to society. So they release you back into the public.
You and the shapeshifter are standing outside the police station.

A: Try to get arrested again.
B: Go through the rip in space and time to another random point in time.
C: Go back and poo in the food slot.
D: Exclaim "Bender is great!"

#40 LDDestroier

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Posted 12 November 2014 - 08:39 PM

D: Exclaim "Bender is great!"

Nothing happened. Apparently, Bender can't hear you.

A: Try to get arrested again.
B: Go through the rip in space and time to another random point in time.
C: Go back and poo in the food slot.
D: Do a quadruple floopty-floop and wet yourself.





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